10 minutes per diem >>
12/11/2025
stream of self-consciousness
As if forcing myself to think up something to write every day wasn’t already challenging enough, transmuting it to a public forum is just the embarrassing cherry on top of this stress sundae.
But I’d be lying if I said this were the first time I thrust myself into the court of public embarrassment, I mean for god’s sake I used to be in show choir in high school, and I LIKED IT.
I was having a discussion with someone about this the other day, about how I used to crumble under the social pressure of being the center of attention - whether I was performing a solo or presenting a powerpoint on ancient mesopotamia, as soon as I fumbled my words or got something wrong, I would get anxious and begin to cry.
I eventually grew out of the crying piece of that equation, but I’ll still feel that emotional trigger to this day whenever I find myself jumping into any spotlight. I’m better at responding to / handling that anxiety, but the trigger will always be there.
Perhaps that’s why I felt the need to relay this daily routine to an online and embarrassingly public forum - to embrace the cringe.
Or perhaps it’s just because I need the content for SEO purposes. Finally, I’ll start coming up in show choir google searches, just gotta mention show choir a few more times.
Welp, hopefully no potential future employers find this - until next time.